Man’s Youth by Thomas Wolfe
人的青春 (托马斯 伍尔夫著)(本人翻译)
Man’s youth is a wonderful thing: it is so full of anguish and of magic and he never comes to know it as it is, until it has gone from him forever. It is the thing he cannot bear to lose, it is the thing whose passing he watches with infinite sorrow and regret, it is the thing whose loss he must lament forever, and it is the thing whose loss he really welcomes with a sad and secret joy, the thing he would never willingly relive again, could it be restored to him by any magic.
人的青春是神奇的,充满了苦恼和魔力。可是人不到永远失去青春,却不能明白这一点。青春,是人无法忍受失去东西;是以无比悲伤和悔恨的目光看着它逝去的东西;是对它的离去感到永恒悲叹的东西,但又是以一种既悲哀又喜悦的心情来迎接它的流逝的东西。即使有什么魔力可以使他重返青春,他也绝不愿意重新年轻。
Why is this? The reason is that the strange and bitter miracle of life is nowhere else so evident as in our youth. And what is the essence of that strange and bitter miracle of life which we feel so poignantly, so unutterably, with such a bitter pain and joy, when you are young? It is this: that being rich, we are so poor; that being mighty, we can yet have nothing, that seeing , breathing, smelling, tasting all around us the impossible wealth and glory of this earth, feeling with an intolerable certitude that the whole structure of the enchanted life---the most fortunate, wealthy, good and happy life that any man has ever known ---is ours---is our at once, immediately and forever, the moment that we choose to take a step, or stretch a hand, or say a word---we yet know that we can really keep, hold, take, and possess forever---nothing. All passes; nothing lasts: the moment that we put our hand upon it, it melts away like smoke, is gone forever, and the snake is eating at our heart again; we see then what we are and what our lives must come to.
为何如此?原因在于奇特而又痛苦的生命奇迹,再没有像在青春时期那么彰显。在我们年轻时让我们感到如此强烈,如此难以言表,带给我们如此的痛苦和喜悦的,那种奇特而又痛苦的生命奇迹的本质,又是什么呢?那本质就是:我们既富有,却又贫困;既强大,却一无所有;在看到,嗅到,尝到我们周围难以置信的这个星球上的财富和辉煌时,只要我们选择前进一步,伸出手来,说一句话,就会无比自信地感到,全部的美好生活,那种人类所知的最幸运,最富有,最美好,最幸福的生活,就会全部,立刻,并且永远属于我们所有。然而,我们也明白,我们并不能真正永久保留,持有,获得,拥有这一切。万物都要逝去,不会永恒延续。当我们伸手触及一物,它便如烟尘般散去,永远消失。我们的心便如遭蛇噬般痛苦,于是我们就明白了我们的人生和生命的必然结局。
A young man is so strong, so mad, so certain, and so lost. He has everything and he is able to use nothing. He hurls the great shoulder of his strength forever against phantasmal barriers, he is a wave whose power explodes in lost mid-oceans under timeless skies, he reaches out to grip a fume of painted smoke; he wants all, feels the thirst and power for everything, and finally gets nothing. In the end, he is destroyed by his own strength, devoured by his own hunger, impoverished by his own wealth. Thoughtless of money or the accumulation of material possessions, he is none the less defeated in the end by his own greed---a greed that make the avarice of King Midas seem paltry by comparison.
年轻人是如此强壮,如此疯狂,如此自信,但又如此迷惘。他拥有一切,却无法使用;他以自己的强健,向虚幻的困难发起不停歇的冲击;他是永恒天空下面迷惘的大洋深处的狂浪;他伸出手来,想要抓住幻境的烟雾;他想要一切,渴望获得主宰一切的权力,可到头来还是两手空空。最终,他被自己的力量摧毁,被自己的贪婪吞噬,被自己的富有掏空。无论是无视金钱,还是财富堆积,最后他同样被自己的贪欲,那是一种连能够点石成金的迈达斯王都感到相形见绌的贪欲,所葬送。
And that is the reason why, when youth is gone, every man will look back upon that period of his life with infinite sorrow and regret. It is the bitter sorrow and regret of a man who knows that once he had a great talent and wasted it, of a man who knows that once he had a great treasure and got nothing from it, of a man who knows that he has strength enough for everything and never used it.
那就是为什么当青春逝去,每个人都会以无尽的悲伤和悔恨的心情来回顾人生的那个阶段的原因。之所以感到悲伤和悔恨,是他明白他曾经拥有了不起的才能,却白白荒废;是他明白他曾经拥有巨大的财富,却从中毫无所得;是他明白他无所不能,却从未使用这种能力。
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